The lamp of the earth

"There seems to be a noise over there. Let's go and have a look." The purple electric figure flashed and went to one side of the forest.

From then on, Jane would hear her mother cursing someone's name in a very, very low voice when she was working alone, and she kept saying it, and the words were very harsh. The hatred that was suppressed but could not be concealed made the sound of gnashing teeth sound creepy. Other times, while cooking in the kitchen or taking a bath in the toilet, my mother sighed exaggeratedly and long. Her voice was full of her deep boredom and disappointment with the world, and she was irritable. He felt a chill in his bones at his mother's sigh. At that time, Jane would usually get tired of hiding in her room and sit alone with her legs curled up for a while to calm her fear, and then begin to wonder for no reason who the person her mother was cursing secretly was and why she was so sad. Jane, as a teenager, had been growing up in this kind of speculation and fear. Mother has always resented. In her life, she never got some kind of inner satisfaction. At that time, Jane had no sympathy in the face of her mother's endless complaints. Nor does she ever articulate the source of her resentment to her son. He can't ask. Relatives, these things have become taboo. As a teenager, he indulged in this confrontation with his mother. When the situation was so serious that it could not be saved, Jane's heart was still only very dull and occasionally disappointed. However,Nonoxynol 9 Factory, before this dull and numb disappointment, he had tried to save it. Not long after I returned to the city, I was thirteen years old. Jane learned her mother's birthday from her ID card. He went out of his way to buy a gift — a scarf — and wrapped it up for his mother on the morning of her birthday. It was a Sunday morning, and he remembered it clearly. He had to learn painting that day, so he woke up early in the morning. After getting up, Jane did not wash her face and brush her teeth,Theobromine Powder, but ran to the door of her mother's room with a gift in her arms. However, when he pushed open the unclosed door and was about to shout out, he was stunned to find two naked bodies lying together, and the muscles on the man's back were excited by the exertion, moving in an incredible posture. They were too involved to notice Jane immediately: she closed the door softly, holding her breath. At that time, he did not know exactly the truth of lust, nor did he know what his mother and he were doing, and he even heard his mother's faint laughter. But he still felt great terror and shame. Jane gently went back to her room and crouched down with her legs in a circle to calm her mood. A few minutes later, my mother suddenly came in. She was crying in a panic and hugged Jane tightly. He was caught off guard by her. He couldn't even breathe. From her arms, she saw the man putting on his shirt and rushing out of the door. Mother took Jane to bed and asked him nervously, "What did you see?" You Jane thought for a moment and told her first lie: "I didn't see anything.". Mother seemed not to hear, Sex Enhancement Powder ,L Methylfolate Factory, or not to care, his obvious lie. Mother began to speak to herself, intermittently monologuing that she was as depressed as all the women who fell in love in the world, but her feelings were more closed and tragic. The mother said to her son, who had only been with her for a year, "You can't understand because you are young." In fact, it's really nothing. Mom loves him. He must love me, too. After your father's been gone so long.. As she spoke, her mother burst into tears again. From then on, Jane, a teenager, was completely tired of her mother's tears. The choked, inarticulate sentence, years later, was the only confession he had ever heard from his mother about her love life. From then on, he only remembered that his mother's life was full of resentment towards all kinds of people, including his father. The Lamp of the Earth Mother Loses Patience (2) My mother sometimes told her very calmly about my father, a man who, when he was young, wore a white shirt with half sleeves rolled up and indanthrene blue trousers. With Pale, green skin and the beauty of a poet. But also selfish, split personality. At the age of eighteen or nineteen, his father and mother were driven by fate to the northern countryside as educated youth, and his mother was fascinated by his childish and luxurious talent-he was a young poet. In those desolate years, they had the same desolate love, but in the end, shortly after Jane was born, he abandoned her with his own hands. Those years were buried in the north, and the mountains and snow-covered ice lakes of the Lesser Khingan Mountains were silent in the sad and distant dusk. The land and the youth and passion on it have been completely abandoned by the current social values, except for the destruction of the past, which is no longer true. My mother often used my father's example to complain meaningfully about a man's heart of stone. Don't trust men, she said. They are selfish and cold-blooded people who can abandon their children with their own hands. Teenage Jane was only tired of such rancor. At that time, he was still an ignorant child, and his mother's pessimistic and sophisticated way of life had a profound impact on his understanding of the world. Before he stepped into the world and experienced the warmth and coldness of the world, just after the end of his simple and carefree childhood in the countryside, his mother suddenly and repeatedly complained about his hatred for her world, and repeatedly warned him that the indifference and ruthlessness of the world exceeded his imagination.. Mother is bitter. She had no one but Jane to whom she could pour out her bitterness and resentment. It's not her fault. But he is still a child. This is really hard for him to accept. I'm not willing to accept it. He is a son himself and is destined to grow up to be a man. His mother's endless complaints about male roles and criticism of the world make him lose his value direction. In this regrettable world, he himself has no father,Glucono Delta Lactone, and a son who has no father as a male role model, living with a mother whose personality is completely distorted by experience, is usually at a loss about what kind of role he should be.


12 Blog posts